Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Singing to the Choir

I suppose it makes perfect sense to make global warming a faith-based initiative:

Apparently, the president’s council envisions the “partnership” between government and religious institutions as a means of spreading the administration’s environmental warnings, rather than just a way to help churches feed the hungry and clothe the poor. Faith-based organizations, the report notes, can take “a prominent leadership role in influencing policy, education, and action in those areas.”

In the spirit of the partnership that the President’s Advisory Council on Faith-Based and Neighborhood Partnerships envisions between church and state to combat global warming, with apologies to Julia Ward Howe, I give you a song to complement my poem:

The Prattle Hymn of the Republic

Mine eyes have seen the glory of the greening of the Al:
He is trampling out the derricks where the oil of wrath is drilled;
He hath loosed the fateful thinking of His terrible swift gourd:
Al's inconvenient truth is marching on.

(Chorus)
Glory, glory, carbon credit!
Glory, glory, cap and trade!
Glory, glory, carbon credit!
Al's inconvenient truth is marching on.

I have seen Al in the iPods of a hundred Earth Day camps,
They have builded Al an altar in the evening news and damps;
I can read His righteous sentence by the dim and twisty lamps:
Al's day after tomorrow is marching on.

(Chorus)
Glory, glory, carbon credit!
Glory, glory, cap and trade!
Glory, glory, carbon credit!
Al's inconvenient truth is marching on.

I have read a fiery Peace Prize writ in burnished prose of zeal:
"As ye deal with my deniers, so with you my grace shall deal;
Let the Hero, born of warming, crush the serpent with his heel,
Since Al is marching on."

(Chorus)
Glory, glory, carbon credit!
Glory, glory, cap and trade!
Glory, glory, carbon credit!
Al's inconvenient truth is marching on.

He has sounded forth the warming that shall never call retreat;
He is sifting carbon footprint out before His judgment-seat:
Oh, be swift, Congress, to answer Him! be jubilant, my Tweet!
Our Al is marching on.

(Chorus)
Glory, glory, carbon credit!
Glory, glory, cap and trade!
Glory, glory, carbon credit!
Our Al is marching on.

In the beauty of the lilies hybrids were born across the sea,
With a glory in His Prius that transfigures you and me:
As He profited to make his movie, let us die to make cars Green,
While Al is marching on.

(Chorus)
Glory, glory, carbon credit!
Glory, glory, cap and trade!
Glory, glory, carbon credit!
While Al is marching on.

He is wealthy by the taxing of the money that you save,
He is Wisdom to the mighty, He has Suckers for his slave,
So the world shall be His footstool, and the editor of Times His knave,
Our Al is marching on.

(Chorus)
Glory, glory, carbon credit!
Glory, glory, cap and trade!
Glory, glory, carbon credit!
Our Al is marching on.

Sing it, brothers and sisters!

And be warned. Global warming hysteria has driven me to poetry. Now song. Keep this crud up and I swear to God that interpretive dance is next.

Now go and emit no more.